Monday 28 May 2012

The Buffet tales

At first thought, going to a casino seems a bit overdoing.Moreover a casino in Goa that too on a cruise!! Would it be any good ?

The numbers :
Entry Fee : Rs.2000
What you get : Rs.1000 (Rs 500 x 2) complimentary playing coupons
What about food : There is a buffet !! No more queries from me,here are my four green Gandijis.
What about drinks : there is free unlimited alcohol!! No more queries from Tiwari.It was Shaurya's idea from the start while Adarsh was excited about the prospect of becoming a millionaire overnight(or alteast recovering his whole Goa tour expenditure)  and you know Sahil ,he was and is always like 'Just do it' people. A few more green and some red Gandhijis came out.
As for the three left out(Avnish,Vakul and Arora) ,when you are in front of a casino,playing safe is not the best move.I am sure they now regret it.The remaining part of the story needs special attention so I will get back to it some other time.

Getting back to the topic,
Buffet to me is what unlimited download is to download freaks or what unlimited STD calls is to long distance lovers.The starters which never ends,the diverse main course and then the dessert!! The chocolate fountains,tons of cakes of all kinds,stuffed things in glasses ,hot gulab-jamuns etc etc.The best part is you can do a Pan Singh Tomar with difference flavors not just vanilla.

It all started with the first visit to Barbeque Nation which might have been our last visit had any one of us(Anurag,Rohit and myself) fallen out of a moving metro.Now we know why the virtual lady keeps shouting 'Do not lean on the door' because it does open even when the metro is moving.Though later calculations reveal that it was only Rohit who would have flown out.

Like all famous cults, there are certain rules of buffets :

  • Find the exact cost  and is there any discount you can get.
  • Find what they are serving.
  • Reserve the table in advance.
  • The most important of all : Keep a fast for the entire day,the buffet Gods are disrespected if you eat anything else during the day.I now realize how much pain my mother goes through when she keeps a fast.But you gotta do what you gotta do to please the Gods.
  • Try to figure out some crooked way to make someone else to pay for your dinner buffet.This is where we are lucky to have Aman Mittal and for once Honey Patodi too!!
Honey (I have a friend whose name is Honey,how cool am I !!) will be the only person I know who pays for buffet at Zinos for three people and does not go himself, thanks to shrewd convincing skills of Adarsh.Had we taken Honey we would have to pay a part of the bill however small that might have been while in his absence we were able to avail the offer of 'dinner for three at the cost of two'(keep in mind this offer is valid only on weekends).

The other party at Zinos was again unique in its own way. The complex bill sharing formula was dependent on the constant B which is directly proportional to your stipend at intern.
So,
B = your stipend at intern / Sum total of stipends of all the persons involved
Your share of the bill = B * total bill .

But then there are great people like Aman Mittal who alone can host a buffet for 10 people,just dont forget to invite Sagar Sachdev.We all from Satpura House thank TODAI to select Aman and we kindly request you to continue sending the scholarship on time.

Some of you must be thinking what made gave me the courage to write again.The picture below will give you the answer,Though I am still not sure who is stalking me in Germany.
Audience of my first blog post 

Gluttonic Tales is a weekly(not daily) blog so dont bombard me with comments like 'with great power comes great responsibility'.

One more thing :


Cheers.





Monday 21 May 2012

À la carte

There has to be some kind of conspiracy theory to explain why the two of us (Anurag Sinha and I) end up living at stone throw distances every time we move to a new place,not to mention the conspiracy theory has to first explain why do we land up in the same village,town or city with a sub theory for the stone throw distance factor.The grand theory for obvious reasons will be called The Dulla Theory. This distance has always been greater a certain positive constant(hopefully the dual theory will estimate a value) which time and again reminds me of the saying 'Good fences make good neighbors' .I must add that you have to be real good stone thrower like Ankur Abhishek(will get back to you in another post) for your stone to land at Nilgiri Hostel from Satpura Hostel.
Oh, in case you are thinking this blog is about the 'sentiyaap of dosti' then refer to rules mentioned below:
  1. This blog concerns only with food and the drama around it .
  2. If at any point you realize the writer of the blog has nothing other than gulping food at several places during his last three years at IIT-D then you should refer to rule 1 even though realization is probably true.
  3. I neither drink(alcohol) nor do I smoke.For those of you who just murmured 'what a loser!!',the feeling is mutual.
  4. Rules are meant to be broken.
The not so million dollar question: If its all about food,why are people being mentioned? 
The million dollar answer :  The funny thing is there some weird connection between food and all my close friends.In blunt words if you and I have never dined together we are not close friends,not to mention dining together at any of the IIT's hostel mess does not count.So this blog would be about my friends and tales of our gluttonic sins over the years.
for example : Going to Pizza Hut with Anurag for the first time and ended up paying a bill of 1200 bucks or choosing to sit at far away seats to watch 'Ajab Prem ki Gazab Kahaani' rather than not watching the movie as if we already knew this would help us win the the lucky draw during the interval leading to free lunch at KFC!!.Yeah go ahead and judge me but in my defense during my first year I had nothing better to do then go and watch Katrina Kaif .

The reason I consider myself lucky to be in IIT-D is because of the 'D'.Hopefully there will be few food tales from Patna and Kota in future but if I were in Kgp or Kanpur this blog would have never come to existence mainly because of the people you will meet in the coming posts(mainly the A's,the S's ,theV's and a few more ) and the other reason is that zomato does not have a Kharagpur or Kanpur chapter yet and I guess you all know the reason as to why it is so.

One of the main reason of writing this blog is that I am bored and got no other work(third summer @IITD only Amit Agarwal can understand!!) and the other reason being Shadman and his stories of cheap and awesome tandoori chicken and biryani at Hyderabad.So I thought I would write my own stories here in Delhi and make myself feel better.

Over the coming weeks you all will get to know about the various food adventures especially in the past three years,yes I said 'adventures',you will be surprised to know what it takes to find a new place to eat and reach there and preparations you have to do before-hand,the division of bill and the fuzzy set rules of tipping to be followed and this rule is not the same as the pre-defined one in MATAB(yes there is a fuzzy logic example about tipping in MATLAB!!).

Well writing is one of my worst skill sets and I have written like 650 words in less than an hour.This is surely way beyond my daily word quota so until the next post, Bon appetit my freinds.

You are certainly welcomed to throw in your suggestion ,just dont be a grammar nazi.

Cheers.